Blowing
- Teacher: (holding balloons) Ok now, who here is good at blowing?
- Girl: Me! I'm brilliant! Wait no, NO!
Your well ‘ard! Your so hard you don’t need a H!
Yea, I pushed her in a bush once, you know, just after she got back from that back operation.A classmate probably talking about her best friend
Sometimes when im lying on the floor in the semi darkness watching my Dad eat white chocolate hot chocolate powder with a spoon as antiques roadshow plays in the background, I really cant help but wonder, is this really better than homework?Me
You know what they say my tall lanky friend, do not meddle in the affairs of wizards they are subtle and quick to anger.only a bookseller could say this in the middle of a shop with a straight face
I’m sorry I had to ring you back but there was a woman on the bus the size of a blimp!Mobile phone lady on bus
It’s not dirty! We just get a lot of rapes in the underpass!Drunk, passionate, and from Hatfield.
A man asks a trainer in the gym: “I want to impress that beautiful girl , which machine can I use?” Trainer replies, “Use the ATM”
Apple Servers went down, BlackBerry’s did too, must be an Apple and Blackberry crumble.
So you can’t just walk through the tiger reserve, no?
Check Archie has his clarinet. He says it’s stuck in a corner.
Year 7’s need to run faster! That was just a stupid girl that fell and broke her arm!
If you haven’t had a box of wine you haven’t had a box of life!Indignant reading goer
